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How to Tactfully Slide Into DMs

Sliding into someone’s DMs can be nerve-wracking. You want to make a good first impression, avoid coming across as creepy, and hopefully start an interesting conversation. While DMing does require some courage, following proper etiquette and best practices can set you up for success. Here is a comprehensive guide on how to tactfully slide into DMs.

Mindset When Sliding Into DMs

Stay calm and confident. Don’t let anxiety about rejection prevent you from putting yourself out there. Remind yourself that reaching out is a brave action that can lead to meaningful connections.

Have realistic expectations. Sliding into DMs should be fun and lighthearted. Don’t put too much pressure on the outcome.

Tailor your approach based on context. The way you slide into someone’s DMs depends greatly on if they are a friend, professional contact, celebrity, stranger, etc. Customize accordingly.

Do Your Research

Before reaching out, learn about the person by checking their social media bios, recent posts, and conversations they are engaged in. This will allow you to craft more personalized, relevant messages that demonstrate genuine interest.

Craft Your Opening Line

Avoid boring greetings like “hey.” Instead, reference something specific in their bio or posts. Ask an interesting question. Pay them a thoughtful compliment. Share something funny. Lead with your authentic personality.

Here are some opening line examples:

  • “That photo of Machu Picchu looks incredible! What was your favorite part about visiting Peru?”
  • “Just listened to your podcast episode on minimalism. So interesting! Do you have any tips for someone wanting to become more minimalist?”
  • “Your dog is too cute! What kind of dog is that?”
  • “I couldn’t stop laughing at that meme you posted. You have such a great sense of humor!”

Set the Right Tone

Your tone when sliding into DMs is crucial for setting the stage for further conversation. Some tips:

  • Be friendly, polite, and respectful
  • Show genuine interest by asking questions and sharing reactions
  • Bring positive energy and avoid negativity
  • Use exclamation points, emojis, GIFs, humor when appropriate to show warmth
  • Mirror their tone and vocabulary

Avoid Common Pitfalls

There are some rookie mistakes to avoid when sliding into DMs:

  • Don’t be overly aggressive or make demands
  • Don’t get too personal or forward without establishing mutual interest
  • Don’t send long walls of text
  • Don’t use excessive slang or unclear abbreviations
  • Don’t send multiple messages without a reply (take the hint if needed)

Follow Up Appropriately

If someone doesn’t respond to your opening message, follow these best practices:

  • Friends/acquaintances: Wait 1-2 weeks and try sending another friendly message. If still no reply after a few tries, stop messaging.
  • Strangers: Don’t continue messaging someone who hasn’t shown interest. Move on gracefully.
  • Professional contacts: Follow up 1 time after 1-2 weeks. Then move the conversation to email or LinkedIn messaging if needed.

Sliding Into Celebrity DMs

Reaching out to celebrities or public figures via DM requires extra tact. Here are some tips:

  • Compliment their work thoughtfully
  • Ask engaging questions about their career or interests
  • Reference current events they are involved with
  • Don’t ask overly personal questions
  • Keep expectations very low and don’t be entitled to a response

By following this advice on the proper mindset, preparation, messaging, and follow up when sliding into DMs, you can avoid missteps and set yourself up for better conversations. Just remember to be authentic, interested, respectful and graceful. With some courage and the right approach, your DM slides could lead to meaningful connections both personal and professional.

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